More Kitty Tales (and Tails)
Doreen was my school friend and while I was good in school, mostly, she wasn't. She didn't like school, didn't like gym class--neither did I--but I liked my other classes. I got good grades but wasn't athletic and neither Doreen nor I liked our gym clothes. They were not pretty and we HAD to wear them. I guess the boys liked them because they smiled a lot when they saw us in them but they were, well, OK but not feminine. Not at all.
Doreen and I were always trying to figure an excuse to get out of gym class, and our gym teacher was always trying to find a way to deny our excuses and not let us out of gym so we mostly went and mostly endured it and would get red in our faces when the boys looked at us in our stupid uniforms with the stupid cotton knickers. Doreen and I didn't wear knickers to school, except for gym class! It was our way of rebelling at it all.
But while I was good in class, Doreen was good in other things and knew more about It then I did. You know what I mean--IT!--IT!! So she mostly talked and I mostly listened and tried to learn all the secrets I hadn't learned yet--boys and things. She had a boy friend and I didn't. I knew I would but didn't know how to do that so I listened to what she said. Intently.
I knew about part of It already and did it every chance I got. To myself. You know.
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With my hand. It was like petting my kitty, in a way, but very different. I started out petting myself when I grew hairs there and then. . . some exploring and one day it was not just petting and exploring but felt really different and especially good. Great! It snuck up on me and then, well, you can probably guess the rest so why mention it. I never told anyone else but it happened every day almost and mostly at night when I went to bed and it was quiet and sometimes on the weekends in the mornings when I got to sleep late. It felt really good and I tried to make it last as long as possible. It helped put me to sleep and took my mind off things. Other things at least. I'd feel along my thighs and check my hair and pet it and part my lips and feel, get in a rhythm. . . and.
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. . then I'd pull up the covers and rest.
I never told Doreen and pretended to be knowledgeable but she knew better. She knew I did It. She did too but she spoke about it to me so I listened. She even put things in her. Not just her fingers but things like carrots or a cucumber. She said to let them sit in the sun and get warm and it was best that way. I was embarrassed to tell her and didn't but the next morning I tried it just like she said and ended up using both hands to work on myself. But now I knew she was smart. My expert. "And if that feels good," she said one time, "wait for the real thing. !"
"I don't even have a boyfriend or even a boy who is a friend," I said. That got us started on the subject.
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I needed her expert help. She said she was meeting her boyfriend at his house Saturday afternoon. "Why don't you come over and join us?" she said. "His brother will be there, too, and we can sit around and watch the telly and stuff. " I wondered what kind of stuff and it was just his brother but he was a boy and maybe we could be friends and that was, at least, a start in the right direction so I agreed. I could hardly wait for Saturday. Exciting. And I got excited that night. Late at night. You know, and didn't need cucumbers or carrots. It happened so fast that night.
Then time stopped on me, or seemed to stop. Two more days to go and it was slow going. Minutes tick, ticking and the hours were very long but then it was Saturday morning and I put on one of my lightweight dresses. It had been hot weather.
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This time, I wore knickers. I wanted to be safe around the boy who might be a friend. I was not that sort of girl. I was very shy about this and decided I should think up an excuse for not going--like with gym class--but I couldn't' think of a good excuse except I was scared. Very scared. But how could I tell Doreen I was afraid. Afraid of what? Watching the telly? She would disown me for all time and not be my expert because she would be laughing so hard.
So I went. My legs seemed thick and I had trouble getting started.
My shoes were heavy but I kept at it and soon was at her front door. Knocked, door opened and then she and I were on our way to her boyfriend's parents house. Knocked, door opened and inside went we two girls. It was a nice house, semi-detached. Not a row house. Doreen and I sat on the couch in the lounge.
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Her boyfriend said he would bring drinks. The house was quiet. I wondered where his parents were. "Where are his parents, Doreen?" I asked. "Spain for the week!" My face flushed. We were alone in the house with the boyfriend and his brother! That was bad. And exciting. But we wouldn't have to be nice to adults, which is always awkward. "Hi. Nice to meet you. " And all that. I wondered about the boyfriend's brother and what he looked like. It was exciting. "You're wearing knickers!" Doreen said! "Why are you doing that?" My face went hot. "Why.
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. . I don't believe it. You're scared. There's nothing to be scared of. We're just watching the telly and having a drink. We can leave if you're scared. " I shook my head. I was scared and did want to leave but I was scared to say it so I sat there and waited. Doreen turned on the telly.
Her boyfriend came in the lounge with drinks and some cheese and crackers. "My brother is late. He had a game. I told him all about your friend and he said he'd be here as soon as possible. "
There was a cat sitting in the corner of the room.
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"Here kitty," I said and it walked to me and jumped on my lap. I pet it behind the ears and it began to purr. Loudly. "That's our family cat. Its name is Fluffy. Fluffy the Cat. " She sure was fluffy and friendly and pushed his head into my hand again and again. "She likes you. She's that way with people she likes, girls especially. A good old friendly cat. " I felt better now. Stroking the cat relaxed me. . . then the front door opened.
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It was his brother. In short pants. His legs were muscular! He had a nice smile too and I was introduced. I just sat there, stroking Fluffy. . . "well obviously Fluffy and you are friends," he said. "I'll be right back!" and with that my potential friend bounded up the stairs and I could hear doors opening, closing, the drawer of a dresser, opening and closing, and then he was back again with us. Still wearing shorts, a different pair and a loose fitting shirt. If this was to be my first boy friend I liked it. I mean. . . Him.
And thank goodness Doreen had turned on the telly.
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I was so nervous I didn't know if my mouth could make words. Then we all four sat on the couch, shoulder to shoulder, arm against arm and I relaxed a little and thought I was really chicken to wear knickers and kind of wished I hadn't. Nothing was going to happen. We were just going to watch some shows and then go home. I felt ashamed of myself. First chance I would take them off and be like my best friend Doreen but didn't know how I could ever do that until much later. Oh well! Who's to know anyway. Right? Right.
There were some good shows. Any show would do as long as I didn't have to talk. I don't know how long we sat there but I stared straight ahead at the screen. That's when Doreen did it. She kissed her boyfriend. Not just a peck but a long kiss. I didn't see her do it, mind.
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I could feel the couch moving and hear the clothing moving and hear them kissing and squeezing. In fact, I could see their shadows in the TV screen. It was like they were on the telly, in moving shadows. Then his brother put his arm on the back of the couch, right behind my neck. I could feel the warmth of his arm.
Fluffy jumped on my lap and settled in. I started petting her again and so did her brother! We were almost holding hands--touching hands-- and petting the kitty. I looked at him and he kissed me. And put his hand on my arm which was very busy with the kitty just then. "You're pretty," he said and kept kissing me.
Then his arm was around my shoulder and I was under my covers "petting my kitty" and dreaming of pretty soft things making my face hot. There were three hands all over me. My own hand and his two and my other hand petting the kitty on my lap, petting under the covers, purring loudly and pushing into my hand, adjusting itself on my lap but there was too much movement and the kitty jumped down on the floor.
I took a breath and looked over on the couch. Doreen wasn't kissing any more and wasn't on the couch.
She had his Thing in her mouth. His head was back and she was licking him. Holding it up to her mouth and licking! And I had both his arms around me, feeling along my shoulders and the outside of my dress, down my legs to the hem and further down. His hand was hot on my bare legs. I was glad for my knickers. A little protection from his hand. I thought I needed an excuse to leave and started thinking up a good one. I had to be home for dinner. I had to meet my sister. His hand was under my dress and warm between my legs. I looked over again and Doreen was on her boyfriend's lap. Sitting on him and straddling his legs. I knew she was naked underneath and seeing her was exciting. I felt a hand petting me, making me hot. I pushed his hand away but the hand pushed back and his fingers felt the edges of my knickers.
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I pushed again and. . . again and squeezed on the hand. The fingers were under my knickers and moving against my skin. Pushing them aside. It was cool.
I felt trapped and pushed at the hand and looked for help from Doreen but she was busy hugging her boyfriend. I wasn't sure I wanted to do this. Her dress covered both of them at their waists but I could imagine carrots and cucumbers and John Thomas and Rogering and she was lifting up and down at his waist. She opened her eyes and looked at me and smiled. I knew I couldn't leave. She was out of breath and eager and intent and her eyes were glazed. Her tongue came out a little between her lips and then went back into her mouth. Her boyfriend's hands were under the dress, around her waist, holding her into him.
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I couldn't push away the hand under my dress. It felt good there. It was just like my own hand after all so what difference did it make. I did it to myself. He was doing the. . . s. . same thing. It was okay. . . I calmed down and pushed a little against him but somehow it wasn't a push now, I was feeling him feeling me. Making me really dreamy and I took a deep breath and left my hands on top of his and was under my covers, opening my legs a little.
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The scene held me as I was being held and his fingers were slippery on me. And slipping into me. He had pushed aside my knickers and I was naked for him. I liked it and was ashamed of how good it felt and that I shouldn't let him know it. I was resting, under the covers, petting my fanny, stroking, breathing hard. I wondered if the front door was locked. Whether his parents were really in Spain and what they were doing there just now. Maybe the same as us. I looked over at the telly and Fluffy looked back. Wondering at all of us and all the movement and why we weren't just still. She licked herself and I felt my legs spread and I pushed at his hand but he was at work on me, working me up. I didn't push real hard. I wanted the feeling. Not the one I often gave myself, or the cucumber feeling. I wanted the feeling He would give me; what His fingers were bringing to my body and I had to open my legs more and I felt it was coming.
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I was scared and not scared. Frightened by all these things but not frightened. Wanting these feelings. . . not what my hand brought. . . the feelings from a boy's hand, fingering me and I pushed at his hand, or grabbed rather, I didn't want his hand to leave me or stop its movements and lifted my body to his touching. I needed his beautiful hand to know it belonged in me. That my body loved the stroking. It was in a wild rhythm and now I was holding the rhythm on me. I didn't care what he thought. I wanted the great feeling. I was reaching for it.
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Desparate. Stroking his wrist as it was stroking and stroking and stroking me. Looking at Doreen. She was staring at me and smiling, still straddling her boyfriend, just staring at me. I couldn't smile or stare. My eyes glazed and I lost control and held my breath and moved on the delicious rhythms at my waist and exhaled and squeezed my legs on his fingers to make him stop. Please stop now. He had to stop and let me rest. Let me pull up my covers and rest.
I think back on that afternoon. About the boyfriend and the feelings. I remember the feelings but I don't remember his name. A hand and fingers and feelings. How could I forget but no name. Just Fluffy, licking herself, looking at all of us.
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I didn't wear kickers the next time I went to see him. Why bother?
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